只是随意...的故事 (^_^):::since 26/01/2006, 00:00hr:::
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Thursday, November 05, 2009

English Language

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren't invented in England.
We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed
to an asylum for the verbally insane.

In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship. We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway. And how can a slim chance and a fat
chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up
as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off
by going on.

And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?


Saturday, October 17, 2009

寫實社會

老師給小明一篇作業〝什麼是民主政治〞,
他跑去問老爸,
老爸想了就說:
這也不難,像我每天努力工作賺錢養你們,我就是財團,
我賺的錢全被你媽拿走了,所以你媽媽就是政府,
我們合力來養你所以你就是我們的人民,
你哥哥整天游手好閒到處闖禍,是個壞人,
但是他女朋友乖巧可愛,是好人,
咱家菲庸每天做家事很辛苦,她就是勞工,
至於你剛滿週歲的弟弟年紀還小,他就是我們的未來!
這樣你懂了吧?

小明似懂非懂,就開始寫報告去了。
到了深夜,仍想不出來,
忽然聽到弟弟房裡傳來哭聲,跑過去看,
原來弟弟拉大便,
他就趕快去找媽媽,但是媽媽卻沉睡不醒,
他又跑去找菲庸,卻見爸爸正壓在菲庸身上一起一伏忙得很,
只好去找哥哥,原來哥哥正趴在女友身上,也在做和爸爸一樣的事。
小明也沒辦法,只好回房去寫報告....內容如下:


當財團在欺壓勞工,
壞人在壓迫好人時,
人民束手無策,政府卻又沉睡不醒 。
所以,我們的未來~充滿了大便!!

——————————————————————————————————————————————

老師讓同學回家後寫一篇有關"國家"、"黨"、"社會"和"人民"的作文。
小明不理解這些詞的含義,就去問爸爸。
爸爸告訴他: "國家 " 是最大的,就像你奶奶。 " 黨 " 是最有權利的,是一家之主,就像我。 " 社會 " 就是為黨和國家而活,還得聽黨的,就像你媽媽。 人 民就是最小的,說什麼也沒人聽,就像你。"

晚飯後,小明想寫作文,可是還不是很明白這些事,就去想問奶奶,可是奶奶已經睡了。小明去找爸爸,爸爸和媽媽正忙著"床上運動"。爸爸一看他來,兩個耳刮子就給打出來了。小明沒有辦法,只好抹抹眼淚,回房間自己寫作文了。

第二天,爸爸接到老師的電話:
"你是小明的父親吧"
"是啊,什麼事"
"關於小明的作文"
"是寫的不好嗎?"
"不,是寫的太好了,我懷疑不是他自己寫的"。。。。。。
"他寫了什麼?"







小明的作文寫國家已沉睡,黨在玩社會,社會在呻吟,人民在流淚


Wednesday, October 14, 2009

免费的得奖机会?

据称只要登入成为“读者”就可一直享有中奖机会。
http://madvnet.edicypages.com/reader

若是想打广告,目前(暂时性的)不受任何费用。
http://madvnet.edicypages.com/publisher

是个新的网站,值得期待。


Wednesday, October 07, 2009

[转贴] 印尼人砍貓頭激怒神靈&

獨家報導:韋佩莉

滿天烏雲匯集成一對「貓眼」,瞪視著大地,令人毛骨悚然。
(新山6日訊)貓神顯靈,降災印尼巴東?!

坊間傳言,印尼一戶村民因砍殺偷吃小魚的貓兒,把其頭顱砍下,結果激怒了貓靈,引發巴東區大地震,造成死傷無數,生靈涂炭。

據了解,貓隻被砍下頭的剎那,天空突然變色,雷電交加,更詭異的是,烏雲密布的天空竟出現一對由雲層形成的“貓眼”,怒瞪著大地,令人毛骨悚然。

當地村民將天地變色的奇景用手機攝錄拍下,通過在柔佛州工作的印尼女佣流傳至本地。

看過短片的人,對栩栩如生的“貓眼”感到驚奇,甚至有人形容“雞皮疙瘩掉滿地”。

教訓濫殺動物

一名家鄉在印尼的本地女佣西蒂,通過僱主王先生向《中國報》展示全長約2分鐘的短片。

西蒂指出,這起事件發生在開齋節之前,那時,她剛好回鄉,到其兄弟位于甘榜德利亞的家做客,聽當地人繪聲繪影地說起這宗“貓眼奇譚”。

短片中清晰可見,村落上空浮現一對貓科動物的眼睛,令人嘖嘖稱奇。

影像也顯示,天色突變及這怪異的景像,吸引村民紛紛跑到街上了解情況,場面出現些許混亂。

靈異事件發生不久,即遇上印尼巴東大地震,湊巧的是,地震災區離甘榜德利亞約5小時車程,當地知情者相信,這是貓神顯靈,引發地震,給濫殺動物的村民一個教訓。

同時,因短片來自甘榜村民的手機錄影,一般相信,“貓眼”經過電腦特技加工的成分不高,至于是否真有其事,就得看個人詮釋了。

無頭貓靈喚天變色

貓屍的頭顱不翼而飛,村民相信“無頭貓靈”跳上屋頂,呼喚天色變色!

短片中可見,某一戶住家的屋頂上突然閃過一個黑色影子,據西蒂說,村民認為該影像是“一隻無頭的貓”,引起恐慌。

她說,當地村民在殺魚煮菜時,剛好一隻貓跑進廚房偷吃魚,村民一怒之下,將貓頭砍下,把貓屍連貓頭丟在一邊。

“結果,原本晴朗的天空突然滿佈烏雲,飛沙走石,還打起雷,很多走到街上的村民,都親眼看到天空的貓眼。”

她說,之后,該無意間殺死貓隻的村民回家一看,貓屍的頭顱竟然不翼而飛,他在驚慌之下,只好把事件告訴村民,並請來巫師“祈福消災”。


Saturday, September 05, 2009

Comments from a foreign writer BRYANT on MAHATHIR's article "Kaki dalam Kasut"

[Below is a forwarded article. Unwise brains are advised not to read on. Readers are deemed to have the basic rationality to reason. The blog owner holds no liability for any offense or incitement caused.]



This article was written without fear or favour, and it is up to us to digest individually the truth of the matter, especially for all Malaysians (irrespective of race, colour, creed or religion)...



The highly respected Tun,

China is coming up, India is coming up, Vietnam is coming up and now even Russia is on the rise. In this flat world that is all wired up and regardless whether we are Malaysian Malay, Chinese or Indian, and if Malaysia does not progress, all of us would become history of this country! Without the Malay, Chinese could not do well in the country and without the Chinese, Malay would not do well. Both have to work together to bring up Malaysia and mitigate the ascute impact that is being brought about by the globalisation. For me, a true leader is someone who has the foresight that not only focus on one particular group in the country but take care of the future of everyone. A good leader is someone who know what is the biggest threat the country is facing and direct the people to fight off the threat. A leader is also someone who is impartial that has the ability to promote harmony in the country for a long period of time.
 
UMNO is a political looser that leads the country to nowhere. They do not understand what is going on the outside world. They have no clue where Malaysia will be in the next 30 years. With the 3 new superpowers, i.e Indian, China and Russia standing tall and high together with USA and the Europe Union, they do not know what kind of world it would be and how Malaysia is going to compete and share the ever smaller slice of cake of the world economy. They only know how to get the Malays to fight with other Non-Malay on tiny issues within Malaysia, while the two races know jolly well that the issues they are fighting are trivial and is totally self-satisfying. UMNO does not give a damn to how the poor Malay is going to live in the future and they do not care about the real benefits of the poor Malays. They only want the votes from them. The NEP is a good evidence on how they benefit the cronies, instead of the poor Malay. Despite all their despicable acts they are still in the power.
 


The highly respected Tun,

As you are aware, the Malays control the rights to all the lands and all other natural resources in this country. They control all government institutions, GLC and State owned companies. The Malays dominate the lawmaking process in Malaysia; The Malays control the decision making process in formulating the economy policies. The Malays own the largest national assets and the Malays are given shares in the public listed companies for free. The Malays have also been given all kind of priorities when it comes to buying properties, awarding of public contracts, tertiary education opportunities, awarding of scholarships and even getting a job in government departments. With all these privileges and rights enjoyed by the Malays, you are saying nothing has been done enough to help the Malays to catch up with other races, mainly the Chinese. Then what else should Malaysia do to satisfy the Malays? Did the Chinese seize or rob anything away from the Malays or all their wealth was a result of their hard work? If it is all due to their hard work, why do you say it is unfair? I don't quite get your point here.
 
May I humbly ask you what do you expect the Chinese to do if your so-called NEP did not achieve the desired result? Would the Malays be happy if the ethnic Chinese in this country do any of the followings:

- surrender their assets and hard earned money to the Malays unconditionally;
- not to engage in any business activities;
- not to score As in all sort of examinations;
- not to make money that is more than the Malays are earning;
- not to advance to higher education; or
- renounce their citizenships and go back to China or migrate to some other countries?
 
I am a foreigner but I am surprised that your intention is to divide your own country. I think you are mainly targeting the Chinese. Frankly, tell us, what do you expect the Chinese to do in order to achieve what is so called "equality" meant by you?
 


Tun, after all these criticism you have against the present government, I feel that you are starting to loose your rationality on your arguments. You have run out of good reasons to convince us. I guess it could be due to your accumulating jealousy of Mr Lee Kuan Yew, your former counterpart in Singapore. But reality is always hard to accept. No matter how, you have to accept the fact that he is regarded the Father of Singapore but you are not regarded the Father of Malaysia; you have to accept the fact that Mr Lee is able to influence the government of Singapore until he the day he dies but you have not been able to influence the government from the moment you stepped down as PM. You must also accept the fact that he is still very popular on the world stage and a leader respected by many but you are not quite. Because of these jealousies, you are starting to accumulate imbalances in yourself that lead you to embark on a series of action to attack your successors. It is very obvious that you are not happy when your successors are more popular than you.. Is there any good of doing that? What is your intention? Can't you take it easy? During your time, you criticised most of the developed countries especially the Western Countries out of jealousy and after stepping down as PM you criticise every single soul remained in the cabinet for not listening to you. When will you ever stop criticising any people? Can't you respect the decision of others?
 
Back to your recent blog, is there anything wrong with Chinese in this country? Did they seize or rob the money away from the Malays? Did they have the ability to come out with any policies to marginalise the Malays? Did they dominate the lawmaking process of this country? Did they formulate the economy policies in this country? Did they control the government departments in this country? Did they control the state wned companies and GLC in this country? Did they control the country's largest oil companies and banks? You know the answer right? Malays are the one who dominate the the lawmaking process of this country; Malays are the one that formulate the economy policies in this country that favours the Malays. Malays are the ones that control the government departments, state owned companies and GLC. Malays are the one the control the funds in this country. Malays are also the
ones that control the largest oil companies and banking industry in this country. With all these rights enjoyed by the Malays, what else do you want the Chinese to do? Surrender their houses and savings and their wealth that they earned with their hard work to the Malays, for no reason? or ask all the Chinese to renounce their citizenship and go back to China? Have you ever thought of after 30 years of implementing NEP, why it does not achieve the desired result? Don't forget under the NEP there are a series of policies that favors the Malays. The obvious ones would be the distributions of APs and awarding of contracts. If with all these policies, it still dose not give the Malay what they want, what else do you want the Chinese to do? Is the Chinese to be blamed because they are too hard working? Or the Malays to be blamed because they do not treasure the opportunities given? You know very well the NEP has been misused and it only benefits the cronies. So if you have designed NEP to only benefits the cronies, please don't say it is the problem of Chinese that NEP does not achieve its result. It has nothing to do with the Chinese but NEP and the Malay themselves.
 
This is a globalised world, Chinese and Malays should not be fighting against each other because Malaysia is competing with other countries. China used to be backward and lagging behind Malaysia but now they have caught up and have even surpassed Malaysia. Can we ask them to slow down their development? If they refuse to listen can we make a complaint to the United Nation that China is developing too fast and this is very unfair to Malaysia, which adapts a more a passive approach? Who give you the right to prevent others from progressing? Who you think you are? This is a flat world (Obviously Tun did not read the book named "The World is Flat"). Don't be so narrow minded to only focus on the Chinese or Malay in Malaysia. We should now look at the world as a flat world. If Malaysia does not progress, no matter we are Malay or Chinese, we would be extinct one day!
 
Have a God-blessed day.



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